When Jesus was crucified he had one man on both sides of him. Both men were of bad enough character for the citizens and Roman officials to want them killed. One of the men was ashamed of the life he led and he told Jesus so and he also said that he believed that Jesus was the son of God. Jesus told this man that they would be together in heaven. A very short and simple interaction.
Don't think it's too late to be saved and try to turn your life around, and please don't think you're too bad a person to deserve forgiveness; not from the people around you as that is never guaranteed, but by Jesus who has shown himself to be loving and merciful and definitely in the business of loving the worst of the worst.
Never give up. Never stop trying to do the right thing. We'll always fail. We'll never be perfect. We'll never live up to righteousness. Don't wait until you think you might be good enough to accept Christ, he takes you as your are. The church is filled with sinners, there's not a righteous person in there, just a bunch of flawed people who appreciate God's love and mercy. If any of them think they're better than someone else, and there are some, it's just another flaw of many that we all have. We have a human tendency to focus on the sins of others, basically the bad stuff they do is worse than the bad stuff we do, but that's not how God works. The verse in the Bible that tells us judge not lest we be judged, scares the heck out of me.
It's an awesome thing to realize that someone is there who knows just how sick we are mentally and physically, but loves us unconditionally. Would those who do love us still love us if they knew our thoughts? God does. It's amazing grace and it is a sweet sound! May true peace and joy be with you always.
Love,
Brother John